11 months ago

Christmas In July: New Family Celebrations AT FORTY FIVE Magazine Issue 2101 02

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A magazine for women 45+ who want to own aging with spirit and joy. For those of us rediscovering who we are & exploring what we want next. We want more; health, wealth, happiness, & fulfillment. Join women around the world navigating the best years yet.

" A C C E P T T H A T N

" A C C E P T T H A T N O W , A S A N A D U L T , T H E Y D O N O T H A V E T O S E E I T Y O U R W A Y . " guess who is babysitting and maybe next time, she must pay for her own birth control. So much for Africa! Better still it is good to set some limits and believe in education. You could do an educational workshop with both after dinner one night. Do not listen to oh mom! Just say it is ok, I know what I am talking about. How do you think you got here? a deadline with a realistic goal in mind. I know some young adults who would like to stay home forever. That may or may not work for you. Now, you will need to decide when, for how long, and why? This will lead to a discussion on how much. Compassion is free from parents usually when the young adult gives a good reason. However, when you’ve been down this road one too many times, you have a problem, you may wish to seek personal counseling from me. Hey, we love our kids but remember when you told me you wanted to live in Africa when your son was 30? Who is sleeping in my house and with who needs a discussion and a limit? Think about what is safer for you and them. With your daughter, would you like her to get pregnant, and where? If no, and not in some back seat of a car, supply condoms or birth control. If she makes a mistake Once they move out, they may or may not invite you for dinner. When you go over there do not complain about how low the couch is. It is not low for them. Just be amused with how they have pulled it together and of course say some nice things. They want to do things their way now and so if you want to come back, be respectful. No sneaking in their apartment to paint their bathroom. None of that stuff. And do not ask to meet their partners' parents. It is a no-brainer like my son said you would not like them anyway! Getting along with our children requires us to be flexible. When and if you go there and they do not serve coffee ask for a glass of water, try not to stay too long as they will be waiting for you to go. Like my other son says, I hope you do not think we have to entertain you. Of course not, I said I’m just here sitting on the couch as you people watch your sitcom show. So now they are married and a holiday. Whoopie. What's going to happen? Anything? When you would like to make the dinner and have them over ask them three weeks before and repeat it

AT FORTY FIVE MAGAZINE / 13 F E A T U R E S every week after that. One week before, you can ask them to bring the dessert. If you stop doing all the work, making the thanksgivings or Christmas feasts, maybe they’ll invite you. My advice is if you love cooking make the turkey anyway and invite people to bring dishes over. Maybe they’ll come, maybe they won’t. But you will be doing what you want or you could just go on a vacation. It's time for you anyway. Next there are grandchildren. Trust me they will want you now. Let the river flow. The great thing about grandchildren is you can give them back. And do a little at a time, so you are not wiped out for two days. Be careful, you may want to take each child separately, for the child’s sake and for your sake. However, your children's idea is for you to take them all, so they get a break. Well, let's see how that works. However, you can choose to make the best of it. The last tip? When they do phone to say I love you, don’t ask when they are going to come over? Don’t send the title of that new song that’s out, “If you knew the world was ending, would you come over?" They won’t get it. And texting sucks! Nothing I text ever gets through! Good luck, you are going to need it. P. S. Parents usually find their adult children's attitude changes at about 45-50 years of age. Don't fret, the time passes quickly. Learn More Read more articles from Janyse Hrykow. Steam | 18

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