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Age Doesn't Define Who You Can Be AT FORTY FIVE Magazine Issue 2021 14

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The magazine for women 45+ who want to own aging with spirit and joy. For those of us rediscovering who we are and exploring what we want next. And we want more; health, wealth, happiness, and fulfillment.

would like to cancel,

would like to cancel, for now, I was surprised. The very first thought I heard in my mind was, “What? You are not going to take advantage of the discount?” That thought was quickly followed by, “Well, I won’t be offering the discount again. This was her only chance, so she missed out.” I could feel some tension building in the center of my chest and my ego-mind was ready to pounce and take me into a wormhole of judgment. I knew I had a choice to either let my thoughts continue or to place my attention inward and feel the emotions beneath those thoughts. As I tuned into my chest, I felt a wave of disappointment followed by a heavy sadness in my heart. I had extended a gift and she had refused to open it. She wasn’t willing to receive it. The heaviness grew as I felt the density of all the times, I have extended a gift that wasn’t received or wasn’t received in the way I intended. For many years, I had spent time and energy on helping others who weren’t willing to help themselves—all those people I had wanted to help but couldn’t. I continue to have tears as I am typing. The grief continues to wash up and out. All along I thought I was giving her a gift, but it turns out she was actually extending a gift to me. Without this interaction, I wouldn’t have looked within and felt the collection of past hurt and grief from the gifts I have extended that were never received. I wanted to save the world as a child so there were many. Then suddenly, I felt a wave of grief from all the gifts that I myself have refused to open and receive with my whole heart. All my unopened gifts, the gifts I denied myself because I felt unworthy and undeserving. Curiously, I didn’t feel guided to respond to her email, but I did send a blessing from my heart to hers. I was willing to receive her gift: the gift of healing, the gift of awareness, the gift of surrender, and the gift of non-attachment. This one email exchange was full of so much potential, and I was willing to open it fully and receive it all. To read the full article click here. Note designer you need to include the last two lines underneath the yellow. I knew it took courage for her to initially ask for help in 10

the way of a discount, but I have come to recognize that it takes just as much courage, if not more, to receive the help when it is extended. Whether it is in response to us asking for help or someone offering their help out of the blue, it takes courage to say yes and be open to receiving. We may be able to conjure up the courage to finally ask for help, but if we aren’t open to receiving it when it arrives, it remains an unopened gift. The real joy and pleasure in giving come from knowing the gift you are extending is being received. I often say giving is receiving and receiving is giving. There is no difference because when you give you receive and when you receive you give. There is always an exchange going both ways. Even when you give a gift anonymously, you receive the gift of knowing you made a difference in someone else’s life. Even when the gift is not received and opened, there is still a gift 11

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